The Theology of Traffic Jams

By Charles G. Scott
Like a fiery serpent stretched across the landscape the endless line of vehicles stretches as far as the eye can see. It is at the same time bewildering and frustrating: you need to move, you want to move and you wonder what is going on that is not allowing you to move.

It must be horrific. It must be a massive problem. It must be gigantic.

You arrive at the scene of the bottleneck. There is nothing there.

What caused the traffic jam?

For some of you this is a rare if ever occurring situation. You live and commute in an area where traffic jams rarely interfere with your progress. For others it is daily or several times a day and you plan your schedule around the snarls of shuttling sojourners. For all of us working in the realm of the Kingdom of God spiritual setbacks and slowdowns are a constant companion.

A lot can be learned from traffic jams that apply to our spiritual lives.

According to research done by a team of mathematicians, the leading cause of traffic jams is human error. Someone drives too fast or pokes along too slow. The mistake of one driver can cause a ripple effect slowing down traffic for miles and hours of time. The impact of an unexpected event on the road causes a “backward traveling wave” that can slow down traffic as far as thirty miles!

The team developed a mathematical model to show the impact of unexpected events such as a tractor-trailer pulling out of its lane on a dual carriageway (divided highway with median between traffic going in opposite directions). Their model revealed that slowing down below a critical speed when reacting to such an event, a driver would force the car behind to slow down further and the next car back to reduce its speed further still. The result of this is that several miles back, cars would finally grind to a halt, with drivers oblivious to the reason for their delay.

The model predicts that this is a very typical scenario on a busy highway (above 15 vehicles per km). The jam moves backwards through the traffic creating a so-called ‘backward traveling wave’, which drivers may encounter many miles upstream, several minutes after it was triggered. (Science Daily)

Leaders have to deal with “backward traveling waves.” The progress you are desperately trying to achieve can come to a grinding halt by the action, lack of action or reaction of a solitary soul. The result is spiritual stagnation, atrophy and people become frustrated and some even pull off the road you’re trying to lead them and decide to travel another direction.

How do you deal with the spiritual traffic jams in your ministry? The key is found in your prayer life and your personal relationship with Christ.

Traffic jams or leadership/visionary jams occur in every organization at practically every level. Leaders often misperceive that their church, group or organization is facing a “jam” that is peculiar to them. Not true. People are people, organizations are organizations and the problems do not vary. Jams often occur because of these reasons across the board, whether you are driving or leading your organization:

1. Not every one moves at the same pace – It is a hard lesson for leaders to learn but not every one operates at the same speed. When the light turns green some drivers are ready to get across the intersection and move! Others adjust their mirrors, check incoming traffic, turn up the volume on the radio, talk to their passengers, the list is endless. But the point is that not everyone goes at the same pace. When a vision is cast, some people are ready to go! They have been waiting for direction and they are motivated to move! Others are later adopters – the key for leaders to understand is that neither is all right nor is either all wrong. When leaders try to make late adopters feel bad for not moving faster, relationship issues can become bigger than the visionary goal. Leaders must identify the early movers and the late adopters and learn to communicate effectively to both. Early adopters need to make sure they do not run over innocent people in their pursuit of progress. Late adopters need time to adjust their mirrors before they get started. The leader is the key to keep the traffic moving toward the desired end. It doesn’t matter who gets there first. What matters is that we arrive safely and soundly.
2. Something is in the way – The main cause of congestion on the freeway or in the organization is an obstacle of some means. It is amazing how traffic slows when a car has pulled off the driveway with a flat tire! Everyone slows down to look! Leaders know that people in general get sidetracked easily! We all do! Most of us carry a phone, laptop, digital tablet, paper tablet, and other devices into meetings. These tools can become major distractions. Our policy dictates meeting requirements that no email, text messaging or accepting phone calls can be done while in the meeting. We can lose our concentration and get distracted by simple things and cause a major jam in the progress!
3. There is a detour ahead – This is a hard truth for leaders to swallow: sometimes the direction that has been vision cast has to be detoured! We want to believe that we are always perfectly in tune with the need, the direction and the methods necessary to get where we want to go – but sometimes the issue is: we are trying to get where we want to go and NOT where God wants us to go! My favorite chapter is Acts 27. The moral of the stormy story of Acts 27 is simple: it is a redirection of a ship to get Paul to an island that desperately needs the Gospel and a manifestation of the power of God! A stubborn resistance to reroute, redirect and readdress direction can cause severe backups to the plan of God. A rebellion in the leadership took Israel on an extra forty-year journey that delayed an entire nation! Leaders must remain humble and sensitive to the Holy Spirit; this can only occur through extended times of prayer, fasting and accountability to the Word of God. When leaders determine to go their direction it causes snarls to the Body of Christ.

Directing traffic is part of leadership. Moving people into the flow of God’s direction for their lives and the organization means navigating the snarled backflow of jams that occur along the way. It is your duty to God and people to stay on the highway and keep directing traffic! Eventually, the highway will open to the God-directed destiny ordained for you and the people you serve!

Encounter Conference 2013: Hunger

By Josh Rogers

The Encounter Conference for young leaders took place on Friday, January 11 and Saturday, January 12, 2013. Leaders from 12 different states were encouraged to “Hunger” after God in a way they had never hungered before.

The weekend was kicked off with passionate and energetic worship by the SOS (Spirit of St. Louis) Church worship team led by Mike Skiles, followed by a message given by NYD Joe Skiles. He challenged students, ministers, and bishops to hunger and thirst after righteousness according to Matthew 5:6.

Next ILD Director Randy Lawrence Jr. spoke on the importance of remaining hungry, and warned against the dangers of a spirit with no appetite. The afternoon session brought in a panel of leaders to take on the questions of both those in attendance and those “tweeting” in over live stream. Pastors Russell Hylton and Eric Scott of Bethel Family Worship Center in Indianapolis, IN, and National Youth Directors Joe and Teena Skiles gave wisdom to those listening as they answered questions, such as “How can I grow my youth?” and “How can I be a leader as the youngest person in my youth group?”


Keynote speaker Adam McCain brought forth a message about Multi-Generational Ministry. Tom Skiles, pastor of SOS Church, taught on Saturday morning the importance of those who were formerly prodigal sons and daughters reaching out to the LOST prodigal sons and daughters. Then Adam McCain took the stage for the last session teaching on the importance of Faith, Hope, and Love.

While what I stated above is a report of what physically happened over the weekend, the truly incredible things are what spiritually happened. While I can’t speak to the experience of others, I can honestly say that the presence of God came and rested on the Encounter Conference and did not once relent. I watched as people fell to their knees for their Creator with a hunger that sent pangs through the spirit and refused to be satisfied by anything else. I saw a generation, my generation, that refused to be called fatherless, kneel in the presence of a Heavenly Father. I saw a generation that wasn’t lost, but desired, above all, revival. I watched as leaders poured through the doors having driven ten or more hours just to have an encounter with God. I didn’t see a generation that evades responsibility, or that has no respect for their Pentecostal heritage, but a generation with a craving to be used by God, willing to be forged by fire, and desiring to take up the mantle of those that have gone before them.

Encounter Conference was not just a youth conference; it was a glimpse into the bright and vibrant future of the Pentecostal Church of God. There were moments where age didn’t matter, experience didn’t matter, education didn’t matter, because we all stood together as prodigal sons and daughters rejoicing because we once were lost but now we are found.

The real report is about people having an encounter; and that we did. I sat in the video booth and watched with tears rolling down my face as young and old stood together with a desire to shake the pillars of heaven. I saw current pastors empowering future pastors. I saw district bishops crying out to God for the young leaders of this organization. If you didn’t make it to Encounter Conference 2013, then plan for 2014. It’s not another youth service; it’s not another camp meeting; it is an encounter with the Creator, a Creator that loves us.

Dream Dancer

In 2010 as Sydney Williams watched “The Nutcracker” for the first time, she pointed at Clara and said, “I want to do that.” After two years of praying and hard work, Sydney made history as being the first African American girl to star as young Clara at the Indianapolis School of Ballet production of “The Nutcracker.”

“I felt so happy when I found out I was playing the lead role. I was so happy that I screamed. I hugged my dad, my sister, and my little brothers. I felt like I made it,” said Sydney. Sydney has danced since she was 18 months old, participating in many dance activities, including winning the dance category in Indiana’s Kids Talent Expo two years in a row.

Sydney and her family attend Bethel Family Worship Center in Indianapolis, IN, pastored by Pastor Russell and Bev Hylton. Sydney and her mother, Kimberly Williams, share a common achievement. Ms. Kimberly was the first African American Miss Clovis, which is a preliminary of Miss California and Miss America. The night she won, people walked out after her name was announced. “I know the pressure that comes along with being the first to accomplish something. I was happy that she was chosen, but worried about the pressure. My husband and I just want her to do what she does best, which is dance,” Ms. Kimberly explained. “Sydney is a very sweet girl inside and out. She loves God, her family, and dance,” said Ms. Kimberly.

Cookies for Christmas

The Westville Correctional Facility, located in Westville,Indiana, is a state-operated prison for adult males. The facility’s sections contain three levels of security. The average daily population is approximately 3,300.

Each year Westville Correctional Facility hosts a Christmas party for the inmates. During the Christmas season various Christian-based prison ministries and their local churches are asked to help provide cookies for the inmates’ Christmas party. In 2011 the Full Gospel Church of Michigan City, Indiana supplied 300 dozen cookies. Keith Blacksten, a Prison Fellowship Ministry volunteer and a member of the Full Gospel Church, delivered 300 cookies. The gift was received with great appreciation and thankfulness.

In 2012 Dick Brooks, the director of Prison Fellowship Ministry at the Westville Correctional Facility, asked Full Gospel Church if they could once again help supply cookies. Not wanting to let them down, the Full Gospel Church members stepped up to the plate and made 365 dozen cookies. (That’s a lot of dough!)

Rev. Dennis Pickens, pastor of Full Gospel Church and an ordained minister of the Pentecostal Church of God, preaches at the prison on Monday nights. During one of the services, Pastor Pickens recalls a testimony of one of the offenders, who said, “It’s not just the tasty treats, but there are a lot of guys in here that never have any family communications; and to know that there are people who are thinking of us really means a lot, especially at Christmas time.”

Pastor Pickens was inspired by a writing on the wall at the prison chapel that said, “I was in prison and you came unto me,” a reference made by Jesus in Matthew 25. He is thankful to be blessed with members who are willing to fulfill the teachings of the Master and demonstrate real Christmas spirit.

Turning To The Needs Of Others

How often have you heard people say, or maybe you’ve said it yourself, “I’m just not in the Christmas spirit,” or “I’ll be glad when Christmas is over with?” Both of these statements are an indication of an absence of joy in regards to the Christmas season. Instead of joy, many experience depression, a sense of loneliness, maybe a feeling of disappointment, and so on. Most generally, these feelings are experienced because our attention is on ourselves. However, there is a cure for this—turning our attention from ourselves to others.

Dr. Karl Menninger, a famous psychiatrist, once gave a lecture on mental health and was answering questions from the audience. “What would you advise a person to do,” asked one man, “if that person felt a nervous breakdown coming on?” Most people expected him to reply, “Consult a psychiatrist.” To their astonishment, he replied, “Lock your house, go across the railway, find someone in need, and do something to help them.” God says, “If you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday” (Isaiah 58:10, RSV). What a wonderful picture of what happens in our hearts when we turn outward to care for others.

The point is, JOY comes from loving others, from getting our focus off of ourselves and asking, “How can I be a blessing? How can I help somebody else? How can I give my life away?”

Of course, there are many ways in which we can accomplish this. For example, our neighbor in Carthage, MO was a wonderful Christian lady who reminds me of the woman in the Bible that gave the mite. She was living on very limited income, which made it difficult to tend to the needs of her grandson. Christmas was approaching, and I knew there wasn’t going to be many gifts under her Christmas tree. We bought her grandson several gifts and had our grandchildren present them to her grandson on Christmas Day. There were not many words spoken other than, “Thank you very much,” but the expressions on their faces spoke volumes. It is true, our hearts will only experience some emotions and feelings and a sense of approval from God when we turn our hearts outward to care for others. This experience will forever be etched in the memory of my grandchildren—a moment to never forget. 

When God told Moses to build Him a tabernacle to dwell in, God said, “Speak unto the children of Israel, that they may bring me an offering.” The Greek word for offering/collection means, “to say something.” When you give your offering, it says something. It says something about your priorities, your values, your understanding of stewardship. When you turn your heart to others, it says something about your obedience to God, your love for God and others, and your willingness to hold onto things with an open hand. It means that all I have is always available to God to be used or distributed as God directs. It is then that life becomes fun and an exciting adventure.

One Sunday afternoon Trisha and I drove to Fayetteville, AR to have lunch at PF Chang’s, a great restaurant. Shortly after we had been seated, a group of probably ten people were seated near us. I noticed they were all talking and looking at everything in the restaurant, just really enjoying their time together. Then the Lord spoke to me and said, “I want you to pay for their lunch.” I asked the waitress for their ticket and asked her not to say anything to them. When we left, we paid for our meals and theirs, and then went across the street to the Pottery Barn. My wife had bought some Christmas things and I decided to take them to the car. This family was parked near my car, and when they saw me, they came over to me and said, “Thank you for the lunch.” Then who I believe to be the mother of the group spoke through an interpreter and said with tears streaming down her face, “I was praying this morning to God for a miracle, and God gave me a miracle. Thank you.” That’s all it took. We all stood in the parking lot embracing one another with tears streaming down our faces rejoicing in the Lord for His goodness. I really cannot express adequately how I felt at that moment. It was just a great moment in time.

Christmas is on the horizon. Let me encourage you to experience the joy of Christmas by turning your thoughts to others. Maybe it will be a phone call to encourage someone; maybe it will be taking the time to mend friendships; maybe it will be some form of a kind deed. Whatever the Lord speaks to you to do, do it and you will find a joy springing up in your soul.

From Trish and I, Merry Christmas to you and your family.

-Loyd Naten

The Miracle of 23rd & Annie Baxter

 

The evening of May 21, 2011 came and went without the much-anticipated “second coming” event taking place. It had been confidently predicted by Harold Camping from Oakland, CA right down to the exact time of 6 p.m. Several hours later and half-way across the nation, the congregation of Christpoint Church in Joplin, MO gathered for Sunday morning worship. Pastor Josh Pennington made a reference to the deadline that now was well overdue, and appropriately preached on the Judgment Day without an inkling of a thought that by 6:00 that evening a life-altering event of its own would take place in their church and community.

Christpoint Church sits on the corner of 23rd and Annie Baxter in Joplin with a rich history in the Pentecostal Church of God. Rev. and Mrs. W.C. Marcus felt led of the Lord to begin the church in a vacant building on this corner in 1934. It had been a dancehall upstairs and a barbershop below, but this location would never be the same once it was secured for $8 a month as a place of worship. Its growing congregation began making structural changes, which included removing the second floor and eventually widening the building. 

The 23rd and Annie Baxter church continued to thrive as great men of God followed Rev. Marcus as pastor, including Revs. Earl Sage, Earl Jeffcott, J.A. Matthews, E. Reynolds, Gene Woods, Paul Shipley, Mrs. K.R. Camp, Jewell Hunt, L.D. Keithley, R.L. Clark and Ferrell Semler.

In 1964 they purchased a lot for an educational annex, and in January 1965 Rev. Paul Dilts moved his family from Bartow, Florida to become pastor. Examination of the old building indicated the urgent need for new construction. Miraculously, God provided enough to get started, and faith carried the congregation through to completion of a new sanctuary and relocation of the annex. A formal dedication service for this new beginning took place on June 27, 1971.

Brother Dilts resigned in 1974 to answer the call to the mission field of Guatemala and Central America.  The pastors that would follow him were Revs. T.J. Thomas, Edward Harrell, Charles Bledsoe, Don Shute, Doug Lewis, Don DeClue, Marvin Turner and Wayman Ming Jr., who moved the congregation to a larger facility where it became Joplin Family Worship Center, now located on East 7th Street.

This historic corner was for sale in 1994 and drew interest from former members who sought the Lord about the purchase of the property. Through much prayer, faith, and perseverance, the location once again became theirs in January 1995 with the now 20-year-veteran missionaries Paul and Marjorie Dilts returning as pastors.

When the Dilts retired, Rev. and Mrs. Dan Saunders became pastors in 2002. Meanwhile, that same year a young man named Josh Pennington began a pastorate at New Beginnings Worship Center in Cynthiana, Kentucky. He pastored there while attending Asbury Seminary in Wilmore with no idea what God was preparing him for. But he knew each step was ordained and would take him on a divine path of destiny.

After graduating from Asbury, he resigned his church and took a teaching position at Messenger College in Joplin, MO in January of 2010. During his first month in town he was driving around the city exploring Pentecostal Church of God churches for consideration as a home church. The divine path he had embarked upon years before led him to Annie Baxter St. where he turned the corner at 23rd. In that moment he heard the voice of the Lord speak to him and say, “You will pastor this church.” He immediately dismissed it, knowing they had a pastor. “I would never want someone’s position,” he said without stopping to analyze the word he had heard. He just knew that his heart was to walk in peace and let God continue to order his steps.

Several months later the church came open and Bro. Pennington called the district bishop, then one of the board members, and they scheduled him to preach. He had indeed heard from God, but the word wasn’t fulfilled until later that year when he was elected as pastor in September 2010.

In January of 2011 the congregation of the church known throughout the organization as “23rd and Annie Baxter” officially re-named themselves “Christpoint Church.” They restructured their children’s education program, and began a fundraiser to remodel the nursery and children’s facilities. The congregation was growing at a steady pace, as did the excitement and anticipation. It was obvious that God was building His church as Pastor Josh reinforced the importance of prayer. Christpoint Church began to set time aside to focus on prayer, and prayer would be the foundation that built a wall of protection around them in their moment of need.   

The morning of May 22, 2011 was a far more average day than Harold Camping predicted it would be. The congregation of Christpoint Church gathered together in worship totally unaware that their moment of need would soon arrive. Pastor Josh picked up the worship leader, Shawn, at 5:15 for the evening music rehearsal in preparation for the 6:00 service. He also had a planning meeting to attend for an upcoming church event. 

By 5:30 there were 17 people in the building. Cindy Christians was in the meeting with Pastor Josh when her son, Jonah, suddenly bolted through the door. “He said there was a tornado heading our way,” Cindy explained, “but we didn’t take him seriously. When he persisted, we decided to go with him to look—and there it was!” They all quickly huddled together in a corridor between the sanctuary and fellowship hall clinging to each other. “At one point I felt the force of the tornado begin pulling us out,” Pastor Josh described. “All we could do was pray.” As glass and debris flew around them, a force of another kind played a game of tug-of-war with their lives, and in their hour of need—God won!

The tornado was a catastrophic EF5 multiple-vortex tornado with winds more than 200 mph that struck the Joplin community at approximately 5:41 that afternoon. It reached a maximum width in excess of 1 mile during its path through the southern part of the city. It rapidly intensified and tracked eastward across the city, and then continued eastward across Interstate 44 tipping over 18-wheel trucks as if they were toys. Then it traveled into rural portions of Jasper County and Newton County.

The death toll would end up being 161. Four of the casualties were part of Christpoint Church. It was recorded as the deadliest tornado in America since 1947. There were more than 1,000 injured as well, with hundreds of businesses affected and thousands of jobs lost.

Within a span of minutes, the 23rd & Annie Baxter church that had been a fixture in our organization for years was uninhabitable. It suffered shattered windows, stripped exterior with objects embedded in the roof. The rain-wrapped tornado had soaked the inside, while the high winds sent objects into the walls, creating holes and dents throughout.

Cars were strewn about in the rubble-filled parking lot, but the sight and sounds beyond that lot were nothing less than shocking. What had been a house-filled neighborhood now lay in heaps of unrecognizable rubble. People were wandering through the streets in a daze calling out for survivors, while trees, telephone poles, and wires blocked their pathways. And what had always been blocked from view by homes and buildings was St. Johns Hospital three blocks away looking as if it was sitting in a war zone. Sirens and car horns could be heard throughout the area as alarms were set off by the violent winds tossing vehicles around.

An ordinary Sunday at Christpoint Church had now become a defining moment for its congregation and the community around it. Miraculously there were only minor injuries to the 17 who were in the building. Messenger College graciously offered their chapel facilities as a temporary home for the Christpoint family to worship in as their focus shifted to the desperate needs of those left homeless from the tornado.

The following weeks would require Pastor Josh and his congregation to bear down and begin the rebuilding process. It was not a coincidence that a seasoned contractor, David Yates, and his wife Patti, had become a part of the church months before the tornado. With his experience and skill they were able to get a plan and move forward with a determination to once again worship at 23rd and Annie Baxter.

During this process the church continued to see growth, and revival broke out in their midst. The building began to slowly take shape as the lives of those who made Christpoint their home were strengthened and renewed. It soon became apparent that victory had been birthed through tragedy. Everyone began to work together like a well-oiled machine, many sacrificing their Saturdays and evenings to grab a hammer or a paintbrush. It was only a matter of time before Christpoint Church would celebrate a new beginning of its own with anticipation of what God had in store for their future. 

The day of October 7, 2012 at 3:00 in the afternoon would be a Celebration Service in honor of their amazing accomplishment. In that Sunday morning service the atmosphere was much different as the congregation gathered in their new facilities. The growth was apparent as the sanctuary was full to capacity. There were guests and special speakers scheduled for the exciting event later in the day, but first there was some business to tend to. Pastor Josh felt led of the Lord to call his congregation to a solemn assembly. 

It was with great reverence and humility that the members of Christpoint Church bowed their heads in repentance for anything that may have stood between them as a cooperate body and moving forward with the favor of God. They had a time of reflection, followed by prayers of repentance and thankfulness for where God had brought them. Then they prayed they would be mindful of every action taken as they join hands and march on toward a prosperous future. 

The afternoon service did not disappoint as area pastors and friends came to share the joy at seeing a fully-remodeled building, with a coffee shop and children’s wing that was more elaborate than formerly planned. And the entire project was completed without acquiring any debt! 

The service opened with worship led by Shawn Taylor and the praise team. The general secretary of the Pentecostal Church of God, Rev. Loyd Naten, was joined by the World Missions director, Rev. Virgil Kincaid, and the district bishop, Rev. Bob McGee, who all shared words of encouragement for the occasion.   

Plaques were given to two former pastors who were present, Revs. Paul and Marjorie Dilts and Rev. and Mrs.Dan Saunders. “Our church has a great heritage,” Pastor Josh acknowledged. “Great men and women have gone before us.” Because of those who blazed a trail on that corner and sowed seeds that are now springing forth, the church is reaping a harvest. 

The service ended by giving appreciation to David Yates and many others who worked tirelessly to make it possible to gather as a church family once again on the corner of 23^rd and Annie Baxter. A time of food and fellowship followed as the congregation and guests rejoiced in what God had done.

On the first Sunday of November, Christpoint Church will be adding a second service on Sunday mornings as a direct result of the growth that has exploded since the day of the tornado. The congregation has grown in more ways than numbers. They have formed an appreciation for one another and a deep awareness of the sustaining power of God.

Pastor Josh Pennington is eagerly looking ahead to what God has in store for the future at 23rd and Annie Baxter where they anxiously watch for the true second coming of the Lord. Because . . . "It is the dream of Christpoint Church to be a vibrant, Pentecostal, multi-ethnic community of believers who pursue God with passion, seeking to serve His church and point the world to Him."

www.christpoint.net

 

Detoxing Christmas

The images are all around us: silver bells, falling snowflakes, children snuggly bundled on gliding sleds, stockings hung by the chimney with care, mistletoe and holly, twinkling lights on fresh evergreen branches, and colorful packages calling to curious hands. The sights, sounds, and smells are familiar to many, and they often evoke warm feelings of happy memories and expectations of future shared joys. Perhaps these are the elements that truly make the Christmas season special.

Perhaps these are the elements that also make the Christmas season miserable—that is, the Christmas season we have come to know and expect. More gifts to buy and wrap, unending cookies to bake, parties to attend, meals to prepare, children’s musicals at which to cheer, and holiday traffic to navigate. The dread of endless holiday realities can put a damper on the underlying joy embedded in the very nature of the season itself. Tainted images of reality and lofty expectations put undue pressure on families trying to produce the ideal American Christmas.

Empty Packages
If priorities are askew and the temptation to keep up with the Holiday Joneses is entertained, stress, exhaustion, and disappointment may be the surprise packages that are unwrapped at the end of the day, leaving many with a “bah humbug” sentiment that they dare not utter aloud. But whether verbally uttered or not, the sentiment is the same and it will affect your mood, how you interact with those around you, and the attitude with which you approach the sacred holiday (or holy day). As frazzled people tend to frazzle those around them, there is a trickle-down effect that can lead to frustration for many others in the family, church, or workplace. Women, as much of the festive planning often falls to you, holiday blues and fatigue are especially close to home. Dear ones, Jesus has comforting words for you.

Conversely, there are those who find themselves with little to do during the Christmas season, as friends and family may be far away. Those whose loved ones have passed and those who cannot travel, many of them senior citizens, often feel a different sentiment with regard to Christmas. Intense longing for days gone by coupled with reminders of happy gatherings in other households brings unanswered emptiness, loneliness, and sadness. Dear ones, Jesus has comforting words for you.

I will admit that I have had some disappointing holidays, both as a child and as an adult. I have also had some especially memorable Christmases, and they generally had nothing to do with money or extravagance. The disappointment came with feeling I had too much to do in too short a time and for no real purpose. The disappointing experiences involved circumstances that were too stressful, too unrewarding, or produced little meaning for the amount of effort involved. On the other hand, the meaningful memories made in quiet and unhurried times were often spontaneous, and generally involved intimate and meaningful moments with family and friends. This kind of extravagance cannot be purchased. It definitely cannot come on the heels of people so busy, angry, or empty that they cannot see the reason for the season.

The Root of the Problem
Friends, I think we are addicted to our expectations and ourselves. We are addicted to hype and a lie that says in order to have a proper holiday, it must come wrapped in a package with a department store bow. In many regards, we are addicted to the chaos that distracts us from the very meaning of Christmas—Christ Himself. The addiction is toxic—poison for the soul. It separates us from the One who cared for us enough to clothe Himself in humanity and be with us for the sake of Love. Dear ones, Jesus has comforting words for us.

The Million-Dollar Question
I want to ask a question. And I am sincere in the asking because I am re-evaluating the way my family “does Christmas” too. Even that phrase seems wrong, but I hope you get the point. My question is this: What separates us as Christians from the way non-Christians celebrate? Do we merely insert a scriptural reading about Jesus’ birth in between melodic odes to the Christmas tree during our party? Do we justify elaborate gifts claiming to follow the tradition of the wise men with their gold, frankincense, and myrrh? Maybe they can detect our loyalties by the Jesus pin we strap to our sequined party dress. While the rest of the world worships Christmas, can anyone tell we are worshiping Christ?

How Shall They Know Us?
Do Christians really stand out from the world? We should. Do we differ in how and why we celebrate? Ultimately, yes. But how can people tell? What does that look like? Perhaps they will know us by the way we relate to other people in our world—the kind, purposeful and thoughtful way we interact with each other. Consider John 13:34, 35: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples. If you love one another” (NIV). How do we show love as we worship God? As God came to us in human form, we can come to others also—to actively share love with them as we have received love.

The Christmas season profoundly reminds us of God’s love for us; He came to meet us where we are. His comforting message is found in His very name. It is Immanuel. It means “God with us.” It is literal. He is the Word who became flesh and dwelt among us (John 1:14). He came that we might have abundant life (John 10:10). Born in a stable for animals and with a feeding trough for His bed, His context was humility rather than extravagance. I doubt if there was mistletoe or holly to champion His arrival. No, His was a coming without earthly fanfare, but the importance of the mission spoke for itself. He was birthed that we might experience rebirth—life anew. Seeking to unify man to God his Creator, His purpose was restoration of relationship.

Christ’s love extends to us, but it doesn’t stop there. We find that we are also reconciled to ourselves and to others as we live out the love He prescribed. That’s how they know us. His love sends this message, “When the rest of the world is frazzled and distracted, keep your eyes on Me, rest in My peace, distribute My love.” We can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that Christ’s emphasis is on being rather than doing, and on authentic relationship that is not dependent upon social or cultural etiquette (Luke 10:38-42).

The Evidence of Love
What does love in action look like? It could be that His love is more evident when we choose to greet the clerk with a kind smile rather than scowls and complaints because the lines are too long in the grocery store during the holiday rush. It could be love for fellow man that motivates us to cheerfully let the other driver come into our lane rather than respond with angry words under our breath. It could be the love that motivates us to teach our children living lessons about the true meaning of Christmas rather than let them buy into the default of materialistic greed assigned by contemporary American tradition. It could be love that motivates us to use our “gift money” to make a difference in the life of one who sees no reason to celebrate. It could be love that motivates us to use time spent in unnecessary busy work to instead benefit the poor, needy, and cast-down. One more Christmas play . . . or a trip to the nursing home to share cookies and sing hymns? One more party . . . or a volunteer evening at a soup kitchen? What would most move the heart of God as we “celebrate in His name?”

For the one who is alone, He promises His presence. As Christians, we can do the same. Shared presence is one of the most powerful tools we have to communicate love. Notice, I did not say “shared presents.” These are not things we purchase and wrap, but things He purchased with His life and wrapped with His pierced hands. If we can relax in His presence, exhibit love the way He loves, and follow in the manner He leads, the truth of grace will banish the lie of bondage, and the Antidote for the poison of toxic addiction will overcome those things that promise false hope. For the practical side, there are a few things that might help to cut the chaos out of the Christmas season. The primary message is simplify. Decide what most helps you and your family reflect upon Christ and His birth, and purposefully choose those actions that are congruent with your beliefs.

Gifts
*Be mindful with selections and limit gift-giving. Ask yourself why you are giving and what message you are communicating. What kinds of things will reflect the character of God? In giving gifts, many families opt for presents they have made for each other, or focus more on time and activities spent together rather than waste time and money accumulating more stuff that ends up in the back of the closet. Giving of yourself through homemade gift certificates (for a shoulder massage, trip to the park, a babysitter for the night, etc.) is also a thoughtful and inexpensive alternative. Bottom line—don’t get wrapped up in gifts. Christmas is not about giving and getting presents.
*Budget and plan ahead. Do not go into debt for Christmas gifts. This includes using credit cards. Money is not the measure of a gift. Your heart is reflected in those things you hold most dear (Matthew 6:20-21).

Time
*Plan ahead. Be selective about what is important to you. It is likely that you will WANT to do more than you actually can do. Sanity is important; make your selections accordingly. You cannot be in all places attending all events in a short period of time.
*Delegate. Perhaps the others in your group don’t know how overwhelmed you feel or that you need help. Others may be looking for ways to help but don’t know what to do to pitch in. Recruit volunteers.

Personal/Family Wellness
*Stick with normal, daily routines that can be too easily pushed aside during busy seasons of life (family meals, praying with kids, devotionals or quiet time).
*Use wisdom with holiday food consumption. Overeating can take a toll on the health of the mind and body.

Relationships
*Spend time with supportive, caring people. If possible, invite others to join you who may have no close social network of their own.
*If you are estranged from a family member or friend, consider if this Christmas is the right time to extend love through restoration of relationship.

Tradition
*Try something new. It sounds contradictory, but every tradition has to start somewhere. Make experiences meaningful, change expectations if needed, and invest in truly memorable encounters that will yield ongoing returns.
*Love one another. Go beyond lip-service to the Christian tradition and continue to demonstrate true love. Provide opportunities for children to do the same. Teach children why this season is special, and embody it all year long—it is the basis of the Christian faith.

This Christmas, resist the pressure to make it bigger, better, and shiner. Opt for simplicity and a spirit that no one can mistake for the real thing. Give lasting gifts; give them a heritage that cannot be stolen, that cannot rot, that cannot break, that cannot be outgrown, that is not a false representation of the real, and that cannot bankrupt the soul. Instill traditions and values that reflect the heart of God. Among our traditions are these: loving others, sacrifice, obedience, helping those in need, sharing life together. We need no justification for spending time together and loving on each other.

Jesus said, “I am come that you might have life and have it more abundantly.” Consider the implications of this for your life, your family. Consider the actual differences you will see. This gift is our hope to unwrap this season. Let love be the antidote to toxic addition. Worship the Christ of Christmas, and they will know whom you serve.

By Dr. Angela Reid